Some heartbreaks might not be romantic, but they hurt just as much. Deep, mine and my mum’s long-time hairdresser, was leaving Bengaluru and moving back to his hometown in Darjeeling. My tresses and I felt like we’d been dumped. Who else would understand how much I meant when I said, “just a trim”? Who else would frame my side bangs in a way that didn’t make me look like Salman Khan in Tere Naam? I’m still hunting for someone else to trust my tresses with but on the way I realised I was not the only loyalist around. Turns out 75 per cent of men are more loyal to their barbers than to their partners—do with this data what you will.
Not just hairdressers, beauty therapists of any sort are the people we trust with the most ordinary yet intimate parts of ourselves. There is something comforting about sitting in that chair and finding that the person on the other side knows you in a way most don’t: which eyebrow sits higher and needs more tending to, where you prefer your hair parted, how much pressure is ideal in a foot massage. Sometimes, these relationships are inherited, like a girl coming of age and getting her eyebrows done by the same woman her mother went to growing up. Or my nanaji’s barber who passed on his scissors to his son so that he could keep the tradition alive even after his passing. Below, we speak to those people whose loyalty can’t be bought by that new salon opening down the road:
The keeper of her perfect eyebrows who loves a cheeky gossip sesh
Aafreen Bharucha and Jaya M, Mumbai
How long have you been together: 5 years and counting
How did you both meet? Jaya has been associated with my family since my mother was young. Back then they used to live in a Parsi colony in Bandra and Jaya worked in a nearby salon before going freelance. I started getting my eyebrows threaded by her five years back when I turned 16. We’ve long moved away from the Parsi colony, but she still comes over for the appointments.
What is it about Jaya that makes you keep coming back? When I first started, I had no clue what I wanted to do with my eyebrow shape and thickness, but she just figured it out perfectly. The process is so painful but Jaya is slow and patient with me. I have never gotten my eyebrows done by anyone else and won’t let anyone else touch them. Even if I were to go to a new person to get them done, I wouldn’t know what instructions to give because only Jaya knows.
What’s your love language? Jaya still goes to the Parsi colony and knows a lot of mutual people. We exchange gossip; whose house is she going to next and what’s been new with them. There are times when she brings us stuff from home (Goa) or prasad from her pilgrimage trips. She even drops by to visit my grandmother just to have a chat some days.
This barber inherited his father’s scissors and one of his oldest clients
Dr Kishor Asnani and Jagdish Limbachiya, Deesa, Gujarat
How long have they been together: 23 years and counting
How did you both meet: Jagdish’s father was our family barber. He had a salon in the main bazaar but he would come home for our appointments and cut mine, my father and my sons’ hair in the verandah. He would also patiently trim the hair of my late daughter who had special needs. At the time, Jagdish would tag along as a child. He learnt the craft from his father who passed away in 2003, and since then, he’s been taking care of my hair.
What is about Jagdish that makes you keep coming back? He is very calm, quiet and cooperative just like his father, but he has also improved his technique and equipment according to the times. It’s a strange turn of events; he cuts my hair like how his father would cut my father’s hair. Meanwhile, my sons’ now get the haircut that my younger self used to get.
What’s your love language? Hum sheher ki baatein karte hain. All types of people come to Jagadish for haircuts, and he knows what’s new across town. Pehle ke zamaane main, jab Jagdish ke papa humare baal kaatte the, tab barbers’ newspaper ki tarah sheher ki jaankari ka source hote the. Sometimes we have the radio playing in the background.
